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A Change in Everyday Conversations

Over the last couple of months I’ve noticed a change in the typical everyday conversation friends are having with me. Friend’s attitutes have been changing, yes the economy has something to do with that, but people are talking differently.

A few years back conversations I was a part of or hear, people mostly talked about the things they have – a new IPod, Blackberry, Iphone, new car, new house, new projects, etc. Then over the last year mostly it has been negative conversations about how bad the economy is. People were fearful of losing their things and money – rightfully so! I am one of them, so don’t think I’m critisizing, just commenting on what Im seeing.

Then in the last few months I saw a big shift! I’m hearing a different type of conversation. People are sharing of how they are dealing with the economy. One friend said:

“We are not going out as much as we used to. On the weekends, the kids used to go to the movies with their friends. My husband & I used to go out to dinner or the theater. Now we are staying home and playing board games.”

Another friend shared of how life has changed for him.

“I used to go out and hang out with the guys. The kids used to do sleepovers. Now I am spending more time with the kids at home. We are actually having a sit down dinner every nights & I’m having conversatiosn with the kids.”

Sure these are all responds to the circumstances of how the economy is affecting everyone, but the underlying commitment I’m hearing is of simplicity. People are going back to the simple things in life. Another friend shared:

“We are loosing everything we’ve had. The bank wants to reposses my car and I’ve had to sell my jewelry to pay the bills. But you know what I am happier now they I used to be with all that stuff. We always worried if the stuff would be stolen, If I had the same car my neighbor had. Now all that I am concerned with is the well being of my husband & the kids.”

Wow! I’ve only been focasing on the bad side of this economic downturn, but there is always something good, or something to get out of any failure. I am getting that it is an adjustment where we can go back to what is really of value in our lives – the people around us!

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A Change Gonna Come…

Be the change you wish to see in the world!”
– Mahatma Ghandi

Times are changing and lately it seems like they’ve being changing daily!

Most of us are not used to drastic changes happening so quickly.

The stock market’s ebbs & flows no longer with the calmness of a backwoods river but lately it seems to come with the force of a hurricane.

From day to day the stock market deals with 500-600 points dips or gains. Every other day we hear of new record lows at the closing bell. 401k’s, retirement plans, saving are all dwindling down to nothing. People are losing their homes in record numbers.

In the last couple of months the price of gas has gone from $4.65 per gallon to $1.87. Many major retailers are closing their stores and every large industry is now begging to get bailed out. Changes seems to be erratic but most of all change seems to be eminent.

Most of us (including me) deal with change as an unknown and fear it. We see it as a stranger and hide from it, avoid it, and worst of all resist it!

So what is there to do??

Embrace it – Am I crazy!! – What did you say embrace it??

Yes! Change is the only real constant in life and as such there is no avoiding it. But there is no fearing it too! I can adapt to respond to the change. Now the next question that shows up in my head is “What do I have to change when its’ the world that is in disarray? I’m just being affected by it. It’s not up to me.”

Well the first thing that I say needs changing is THAT! Being resigned to the idea that it’s beyond my control. This mindset only leaves me as a victim of my circumstances.

Second thing that I can change is the way that I approach life. Instead of living a life of “expectation” I can come from a world on “Intention.” So for example: I’ve been griping that the government is violation our civil liberties and our right to freedom. I expect these to be my God-given gifts and I expect the government to grant them to me. I would rather be creating an intention of being free and at peace AND being in action to make that exist.

Third, and the most important is seeing myself as part of a bigger picture. Right now in this country, most of us live an individualistic life. We consider ourselves separate from one another and seperate from Source, God, Allah-Blessed be His name (I’ll call them all collectively as God). In this way of thinking, then the things that happen to me are BIG and MY circumstances do seem to be overwhelming and difficult to deal with.

But if I see myself as one with one another, then I can see that all of us are going thru some kind of change – TOGETHER. If I am one with God, then I can see that my problems are nothing and so tiny for God’s hands.

By seeing it this way I am no longer a slave to the ebbs & flows of my circumstances. I am free and at peace to be me and to be the greatness that God intended for me. But most of all I am free to do something about it!

Neale Donald Walsch on his blog says it beautifully.

There’s no reason to hang out in uncertainty or apprehension or fear about the future… Learn how to use change as the greatest thing that has ever happened to you, and how to embrace loss as not loss at all, but gain.”

This, in my opinion, is the only real way to deal with change. So I invite you to try it on and see how it fits for you and accept the flow of life.

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That Wave is Gaining…

Mega Tsunami - Is it possible?Another type of reoccurring dream that I’ve had is the Mega Tidal Wave dream.

I find myself driving down an ocean front highway. The ocean to my left with a very wide beach.

It always took us about 5-10 minutes to walk from the road to the waterline.

Today though, the shoreline seems further out. The sky is gray and the wind is unusually blowing to the east. Almost as if the air and water are being sucked out to the ocean.

I continue driving for a while, when the direction of the air shifts and seems to be coming from the east again – but much stronger. I park the car and get out to check things out.

Way out there is a haze. It’s like a cloud hovering over the waves, so low that I cannot see the horizon. That’s when I realize that it is not a cloud! I could not see it for what it was because it is truly unbelievable. The haze is actually the crest of the wave, but more then 80′-100′ high!!

I jump back into the car and drive off. I drive south looking for the next turn off. I fly thru that turn and finally am heading away from the wave. Driving as fast as I can, the wave continues gaining on me. I’m doing 100mph and that wave is catching up as if I was standing still.

The wave is on my tail & I can no longer see the top of the wave on my rearview mirrors. Water splashing around me and that wave is now right behind me.


I know! The dreams always end this way with the wave gaining on me but never encompassing me. Now to try and understand the dream.

According to the dream ‘dictionaries’ Tidal Waves have to do with emotions. With my ability OR inability to deal with them. It symbolizes emotions not expressed or “bottled up” but also the tidal wave symbolizes the “clearing away of old beliefs.” To dream of being caught up in a tidal wave, signifies “the strength of your emotions.”

The dream is of several types. It is a Recurring Dream and a Nightmare Type and is an expression of “Your perception of the world, health, natural disasters, criticism about politics, finances, crime in the streets and your inability to control such events may sometimes lead to nightmares.”

Yes, I do have worries, preoccupations with the state of our economy and the concern of where our world is going to be in the next few years.

I also can’t nude celebs help but to think that the dream is also a Prophetic Type of dream.

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Whose Life Is It Anyway?

Yesterday my wife’s car was hit as it was parked next to my house. It just sat there innocently waiting for me to take it for a ride when a young girl sideswiped it and shoved it 5′ onto the sidewalk.

Sure enough the car is totalled. Broken rear axle and the front transaxle is also damaged.

Alero is totaledNeedless to say, the day did not starting out well and it just went south from there.

Two of my work computers freak out and I spent 6 hrs trying to fix them. My office VOIP phone system stopped working – but no worry it will forward to my cell phone.

And today I showed a sign of weakness. I allowed myself to think “Well, it can’t get any worse then this.” No sooner that the words left my mouth and…

As soon as I said that my cell phone would not work. I leave for a client meeting in a state of disempowerment. What a way to start day two of breakdowns!! On my way, about 2 miles from my destination, my car’s air suspension system freaks out! Fu€k!!

“EAS Failure – Warning Do Not Drive Over 35MPH!!” The dashboard kept warning me.

I was in Ft. Lauderdale (more then 40 miles from home) and I find myself like a ‘vato’ driving my ‘low rider machine’ and hip-hopping all the way home. I was determined not to let this setback stop me! No way!!

Anyway two hours later, I made it there. I started the trip back pissed and cursing everything and everyone. But I arrived with a smile on my face and a new found peace. As I’m driving and the car hops at every bump, I find myself thinking of a skit on the “Whose Line is it Anyway Show.”

Whose Line Is It Anyway?Have you seen this show? It stars four comedians who are put into odd situations and they must improvise a skit on the spur of the moment. Not only do they improvise, but they make me laugh at whatever situation they are in. It’s really funny to see Colin Mochrie, Drew Carey, Ryan Stiles and Wayne Brady pick up on something unexpected and just play with it.

So I see myself in this disempowered state and I see Colin making believe that he is riding in a car, sitting really low to the ground and his arm resting on the imaginary window ledge. He is going down the road without a care in the world while in the green screen behind him chaos ensues. The dichotomy and contrast is just funny. I can imagine Colin’s silly smile when he finally realizes what is happening behind him.

What I saw available for me:

Well I say the question “Whose life is it anyway?” Just because circumstances are NOT what I was expecting in life, it does not mean that it’s time to freak out and let the world fall apart! In fact, it’s an opportunity to deal with the bad things in a way that empowers me.

Sure I have every right to be pissed, angry and overwhelmed – but why?? Yes, bad things happen, but I have the choice of who I am going to be in the face of chaos. Do I let that piss me off and leave me disempowered – OR – to I choose to be empowered no matter the circumstance.

I choose to empower myself and overcome the circumstances! This leaves a space available for me to take action about it anyway.

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You Can’t Cross the Sea Merely by Standing…

You can’t cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water.”
-Rabindranath Tagore

So this is where I am finding myself lately. Standing at the shores of life looking out to the horizon, waiting to see what the future will bring.

I find that I have let the economy (or should I say – the stories, chatter, news about the state of the economy) dictate that I stay stranded on these shores.

Fear has a way of causing me to be frozen. Forcing myself to seek out new contacts. Join new networks – even look up some old friends and rekindle those friendships.

Action is the only antidote!

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