Vivid Dreamscapes

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.”
– Ho­ra­tio G. Spaf­ford

I can say that it is truly well with my soul and there really is ‘nothing wrong’ in the overall scheme of things.

Last night my aunt Olga passed away. She had been living 15 years on dialisys for a kidney transplant that never took. This had been affecting her all these years and her body just could not take it anymore. She suffered imensely thru those years and finally, her body was hit with a brain hemmorage. She refused to allow the doctors to operate and release the pressure. She refused any and all treatments and in doing so she sealed her fate. The next day she lapsed into a coma, from which she never awoke.

I just realized that the dreams I’ve been having about the women submitting to their death relates to my aunt! She has been suffering too long.

The graphic nature of my dreams was to express the pain & agony she must have been living with all those years. A prisoner to her own body, she needed to be free. Choosing to die is actually choosing to be free. She is now free from all the suffering and she is free and with God in peace.

Peace be with you, Tia…

Be still, and know that I am God!…”
– Psalm 46:10

It is in the stillness that all is revealed.

Wow, last night was another crazy dream night. The theme from the previous night is the same (women surrendering themselves to their demise) but this time it was more graphic and in black and white.

In this dream, three women approach three stalls and surrender themselves to the execution. each one pulls up the skirt just above the knee and kneels down. On her knees, she crawls into the stall (scraping her knees) to be beheaded. Two of them are way inside the stall and I am spared seeing the beheading. But the third is half-way out and I get a full view of the brutality of a failed beheading.

Now I gotta warn you, this section is where it gets quite graphic! so I have hidden this paragraph. click to expand & read this…

After witnessing that level of brutality, I must call on God’s light to enter my heart and provide clarity. This is where “be still” fits in perfectly. In the mist of the graphic nature, there is a message. I am upset with myself for having these dreams. Yes, they are graphic! I sometimes even question the morbid sense of the dream. So this is where I need to draw on my inner strength and not go into the ‘make wrong’ aspect.

I can’t “be still” if I’m fretting about or questioning whether this is right or wrong – based on my earthly morals & convictions. I must trust and be humble so that I would be usable in His hand – after all, this isn’t for me but for His purpose.

I just simply need to “be still.” There is a message yet to be revealed.

Last night & the night before, I had some very strange dreams. These dreams were of women – mostly late middle-age women – all surrendering themselves in different ways. One was physically abused to her death & never challenged her abuse. Another stretched out her neck into the noose to be executed. Any way they all are giving in to their sentence. They were all taken away to their death sentence, but none resisted.

The other thing that was strange is that they were all asking for it – almost demanding to be killed. I don’t mean asking for it – as if they were evil kind-of-way, but it seemed as if they could not bear the conditions of their lives and asked for & welcomed the end.

The other overwhelming feeling I get is that in releasing their soul from their physicality, they are doing an act of compassion. Compassion of what – for who – I do not know. I don’t quite understand this feeling but it’s almost as if their are sacrificing themselves for the betterment of others.

Like I say, I don’t quite understand this one nor am I going to dwell in needing to understand it. I will know when the time comes.

They mostly followed orders and even gave up what they needed, for others to have. This occurred over several dreams, across several days, thru out many lives. I don’t know what they are about or what they are supposed to mean.

But they had several things in common:

• All the women were late, middle-age – too young to die.
• All are surrendering & giving in to the inevitable.
• They never complained nor even cried out in pain.
• They all welcomed their end – an act of release.
• They gave themselves for others – a selfless act.

But the most impactful part was that they all felt, to me, to be accepting of the fact that they are here due to their own actions. What they did has caused them to be here going thru what they are going thru. They are paying the price for letting their past be the way it was.

The question I am asking myself now – is this a prelude to another visitation? It seems to have the hallmark signs of one, but who do I know that is sick and ready to go? Who is the person leaving and letting me know that their time has come?

So I thank God for the clarity in seeing the sign and for the gift this is. I even thank him for not giving me the foresight to know who the person is, because if I knew (& this turned out to be someone close to me) then I may be too swept up in emotions to see the message clearly.

Now on to the next step. Waiting to see what the message is. Not to rush it, because the next step is the reveal of who is going to pass.

All in due time…

Today is the day!! TR called me and requested time to speak with me about SM. I am a little nervous now but it is time to “face the music” (as the saying goes) and deliver to her, the message entrusted in me.

TR is a friend with whom I have shared about my ‘abilities’ She knows what it is I do and her first question was: “Did SM communicate with you?”

“Oh-boy” was my first thought, but this is what my dream w/SM said would happen. I shared with her that yes, I have seen him prior to his passing. “Was he wearing a dark shirt w/stripes & a Khaki slacks that night?” was her next question. “Yes, I seem to remember he was…” I replied wondering – that’s an odd question. But accepted that this gave her a sense of peace in knowing the answer.

“I ask only because I have not seem SM in a few weeks and the night of his accident he was on his way to my house to spend the weekend with me…” She paused for a minute & I asked her what she was thinking. “I gave him that clothes and that night, I woke up at 1am because I dreamt he was waving goodbye – wearing that clothes.” As she said these words she broke down crying. “It’s my fault! If he wasn’t on his way to see me he would not have died…”

“Don’t say that TR, don’t you ever believe that! It was his time to go…” I consoled her with a firm tone of voice. “It was the way it needed to be and there is nothing you nor I could have done to have it be different!”

“How can you be sure of that?” She questioned me as she stopped crying.
She asked me to tell her what I saw. As I’m telling her this, she stops me. “No, tell me what else did you see?” So I shared with her the experience I had of SM that night and I shared how I saw him. That his spirit started to leave his body during the middle of the seminar. I saw his spirit ascended and finally leave as he was being acknowledged in front of his peers and how he left complete, that moment, even before the accident.

“He was gone even before the accident?”

“Yes TR,” I assured her “his spirit had to go & all that was left was for his physicality to complete & go to rest.” This seemed to put her at ease a bit.

Well, showtime is here! this is the moment SM spoke about and I could feel her hurting heart yearning for peace. I relayed the message I got from SM:

That because of her love, he can go complete. She fulfills and completes what was not there for him. It was her love for him that allowed him to be fulfilled.”

Having been loved and being ‘love’ was important for him in order to complete. And she gave him that.

This seemed to calm her soul and seemed to put her at ease. We continued to talk for hours and now her tone of voice was peaceful. She needs to grieve, but can now do so knowing that it was his time. Not worrying, that the accident took his life before he was ready.

We will never be ready to go, but our soul knows when our time comes.

This morning I woke up from another vivid dream. I had been dreaming about SM & I was having a conversation with him as to why I saw him the way I did. In the dream SM never seemed to be interested in answering what I wanted to know, it was almost as if he would only explain what his purpose was. He explained that he wants his wife, TR, to know that everything is going to be OK. That his passing is as has to be & that there is nothing wrong.

See SM & TR were newlyweds and at the time of his passing they were only married 6-8 months. Of course loosing her newlywed husband is a tragic experience for TR & I asked SM “How am I going to tell her in the mist of this grief?”

SM replied “don’t worry she will contact you when it’s time!” This kind of gave me a sigh of relief – since I didn’t have to find the right moment to tell her.

When I awoke from the dream I felt a great sense of peace & tranquility. See on the day of the accident I went down to see TR and I was there consoling her for a few hours. I knew I had to tell her how I saw SM, but did not dare. I was there for her & I had to consider what her needs were. She cried a lot and kept saying “what am I going to do without SM?”

Then during the funeral services I was holding back the urge to blurt out what I knew. I felt guilty, all that time, that I knew something & said nothing. The funeral service was gigantic – it was not the appropriate time to tell her this! Hundreds of people were there and hundreds more could not be. See SM was a powerful man & he contributed to so many people around the world. He was bigger then life & bigger then I even imagined.

Condolences poured in from all over the world. There even was a conference call, the night previous, for all the people that knew SM, and could not be at his funeral, to express who SM was for them. Interesting enough there more then 100 persons on the call. People from India, Japan, Australia and even New Zealand. That is how big his presence is in this world.

Now, with this vivid dream, I am at ease knowing that my gut feelings are confirmed – it was not the right time to tell her.

It’s funny, most people (or at least the myths & tv movies) believe that ‘ghosts’ have unfinished business, that is why they hang around. But from my experiences, it is not them – but us – the living who keep them from crossing over. They are complete & it is time for them to go, but we have a hard time letting go. We call them back to this realm.

So anyway, the message that SM wanted TR to know, is that because of her, he can go complete. She fulfills and completes what was not there for him. It was her love for him that allowed him to be fulfilled.

Having been loved and being ‘love’ was important for him in order to complete.