“I have to leave.” My sister insists! “I need to get away from him.”
She left quietly in the middle of the day. Mom & dad were at work and this was her opportunity.
As she opened the door, the light outside casts her shadow up the stairs. It trails up each riser and almost seems to touch my shoe. The light, glistening off the metal strap on the suitcase, catches my eye. As I turned away to avoid the glare, she disappeared into the anonymity of the street. Only a note left for him and mom, gave an indication of where she was going.
“It is time.” she said.
Time for her to be free, time for her to grow. Time for her to trust in herself. Her marriage to Manny, at the ripe age of twenty, was a way to obtain freedom. Freedom from mom’s control and freedom from life in the Bronx.
But in her running, she ran into murkier waters. Now she needs to get away from everything! From him, from mom and from the church’s opinions. Divorce is not an option, so running away, to recreate herself seems to be the only way.
As the door closed, away she went to find herself…
My mother frantically searches for her.
“Where did she go?” my mother asks
Days go by and all her friends do not know where she could be. Nobody knew. She asks me and I pretended that I did not know what happened.
“No mom, I do not know where she went!” I reply.
But deep down inside, I really do not want her to be found. This was a clean breakaway. That’s how she felt she needed it to be. Months have passed and mom continues to cry every day. I feel torn – don’t want to see mom cry, but also don’t want to betray my sister’s freedom.
Today, the phone rings. It is her! I am so glad to finally hear from her.
“Put mom on, I need to explain..” she tells me, so I get mom on the phone.
“Mija, where are you? are you OK?”
“I’m doing fine mom. I’m living in Manhattan and got a new job. It pays me more money and can afford to live in a home for young women.”
First time that mom did not dominate the conversation and only listened.
“Mom, how is she doing? Where is she?” I ask as she hung up the phone.
“She would not say…”
I understood that she did not want to reveal any other clues to her whereabouts. She was still in fear that my mother would turn her over to him again. So she trusts no one and reveals nothing…
– only that she will be fine now.